road trip USA

ten things - virginia - north carolina

Before I get to Norfolk, Let me entertain you with this line of thought that is prompted by a recent discussion on US Radio about 10 things the US does well. So here goes - some controversial assertions, and I shall produce evidence, M'lud, over the coming pages to support them.

Ten Things that the USA does better...

Trucks (in a boys toys way).

Freight trains (ditto).

Public conveniences (restrooms, bathrooms, comfort stations).

National & State Parks.

Support for their armed forces, and funerals for, and commemoration of, their fallen military. (See comments in Washington Blog page, and below.)

Air horns on their road vehicles. I'm gonna have to get me an air horn (preferably operated by a pull cord from the roof lining) to fit to my Vauxhall Corsa.

TV soaps (The West Wing, Hill St Blues, ER, House, CSI, Law & Order, NCIS, NYPD Blue, 24, etc etc etc). Yes, we have Emmerdale, Holby, East Enders, Corrie.... Proves my point really doesn't it.

Reverence for their founding fathers and key leaders. Look at the Lincoln memorial (as big as the Taj Mahal) the Washington monument (Washington DC's highest building) the JFK Centre for Performing Arts, The Reagan Building in Washington. If we Brits had our wits about us, Wembley would be the "Winston S Churchill Centre for Footballing Excellence." OK, we'd probably have the BlaIraq Memorial, and the Gordon Brown Dome, and in a way that might be quite appropriate.

Immigration control at the airport. Inbound aliens (for that is what I am) are fingerprinted and photographed on entry. And if we have a criminal record, we don't get in. Period.

Weather. During my brief visit, the US has encountered hail the size of tennis balls (smashing sun roofs, windscreens and roof tiles): parts of North Dakota have had a whole year's snowfall - in April! Floods and droughts: and last week, just a few miles away, a tornado observed by a meteorologist which she described as 3/4 mile across, took out the side of the hospital, and left a swathe of destruction.

Dealing with the M word (Multiculturalism).

Courtesy & friendliness.

Sales Tax/VAT - at 6%, this isn't too much of an imposition. Unlike BritVat at 17.5%.

OK, I know that's 13, but when I started the list I intended it to be 10.

Ten Things that England does better...

Inventing sports for the world.

Dealing with sporting statistics.

Public Service Broadcasting. In fact ANY broadcasting.

Producing a brilliant Military on a shoestring and a few pieces of cardboard. OK, we couldn't take on the Yanks head to head any more, but I'd back our boys in equal numbers and equipped on a level playing field. But our US cousins do give their lads the best kit (and we learned that from 1918 onwards). How much would it really cost us (ie the nation, and us as individual taxpayers) to give Sergeant Roberts in Iraq the Kevlar insert for his vest that he had given to one of his men, and the absence of which led to his death...? Are you as ashamed of our government over this as I am?

Political correctness.

Breakfast.

Domestic electrical systems - the US plug and socket system is laughably flimsy. The British is worldbeating.

Naming towns.

Designing and building the Sopwith Camel, Spitfire, Harrier Jump Jet, and Concorde. OK, I'm struggling a bit by this point... I'll have to come back to this list later with fresh inspiration.

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LATER: Gun control.

Bugs and poisons. See comments below about Poison Ivy, poison oak, ticks and chiggers.

Declaring War. I was going to award this to the Brits because the US so dismally failed to wake up and smell the way their cookie was crumbling in 1914-17, and 1939-41: but since then, they have rather made up for lost time in Vietnam, Grenada, Afganistan and I-raq. Ok, we joined in the last 2, but only on Dubya's coat tails, so I think this is probably a score-draw. Both nations are now pretty good at declaring war.

More to come on these subjects...

Norfolk

Before leaving Virginia, Mr T took a look around Norfolk's enormous US Naval Base - at 54,000 personnel, the largest in the Western World. (Who knows what size a Chinese military base might be?)

An interesting (to chaps, anyway) boat tour of Norfolk Harbour, taking in views of sundry cruisers, nuclear subs and guided missile destroyers.Sadly, no aircraft carriers, of which the US has 12 (about half are based out of Norfolk). The last available one sailed the day before this visit, apparently heading for "talks" with I-ran in the Persian Gulf. (I had no idea that when pushed, they could sail flat out at over 60 knots.)

During the cruise our attention was drawn to the world class Naval Hospital opposite the base, which has just received a $300m upgrade. Contrast this to the supine British Government decision to close Haslar, our only proper military hospital at Gosport. See point 5 above.

At the end of a hard day at sea, checking out the navy museum, and looking over the Battleship Wisconsin (above), supper was taken at the splendid Pagoda Inn, where I met a charming couple from Cincinatti. The intriguingly named John and Liz Thomas were heading to the Chrysler Art Museum for a jazz evening, and suggested I do likewise. I therefore followed and although the jazz was a bit "edgy" for my taste, it made a classy backing track whilst taking a lightning tour of the museum. Two culture hits in one evening... and the 4th musical event of the week. John recommends a visit to Salt Lake City of a Thursday evening, when one can hear the Mormon Tabernacle Choir rehearsing.

The House that Bart built...

...In truth, I think Kara had at least as much to do with the construction! Bart is one of the original Windmills with whom much basketball has been played over the years. He has settled in North Carolina with Kara, and they are raising their 2 boys on this fine property.

Mind you, not all is rosy in the garden (literally). I'd heard of Poison Ivy, but not poison oak and poison sumac: and ticks and chiggers are also a problem. They are picked up simply by walking in the long grass, and can be transferred very easily by touching your shoe, and then your face. Kara was coming out with a really violent poison ivy/oak rash on her cheek as I was leaving. (well, that's what she claimed: it could alternatively have just happened that I caught her without her makeup...!)
Not yet here 24 hours, and already Kara has Mr T working on the land. Bart has shown himself to be generous spirited, and also very bright, in choosing an up-market mower with such light handling that his wife can drive it... (Now why didn't that occur to me?)

The house is set on some of the family's extensive farmland. Most of this was until quite recently growing tobacco, but only a small proportion of this remains.

A splendid southern welcome was extended by Grandma Corinne, Mother Sheryl, and Uncles Keith and Bruce, along with brothers, cousins, girlfriends. To the English ear, there was a delightful burr of rich southern accents.

After enjoying some traditional southern fare, Keith showed us around his beehives and hunting trophies.

Both the boys speak both Dutch and English: well, southern American really! Morgan came into this world in Amsterdam, but young Ashwin was Born in the USA. Their current passion is kite-flying.

Church with the family on Sunday was a striking experience. Around 700 in the 9am congregation, plus 70 in the choir, and about 10 in the band. The music was awesome, with all the words of songs and prayers up on 4 big screens - so no hymn or prayer books. The 90 mins flew by in the temporary premises - I think it's a retail park, which has been pressed into temporary use until a permanent church building can be constructed. No wonder the church is growing.

Whilst at the school carnival (another example of strong community involvement) I talked to the local fire officers from Bahama Station. Brian and Chris had just been to a debrief on the lessons from 9/11. I mentioned that Nipper2 had just been to a similar briefing on Buncefield, which they hadn't heard of, and Bruce took a note to look up on the internet. They have a giant new fire station for what is a thinly spread rural community.

My proudest achievement of my stay with Bart and Kara was teaching the boys "Three Wheels On My Wagon". We sang this at every conceivable opportunity, and I imagine Kara will be heartily sick of it by now!

p.s. Groan - and I've just discovered a tick attached below my waistband... Out comes the lighted cigarette, and [censored:ed.]

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